erin marie‘s blog

Over the weekend i witnessed a little situation go down. A man i know is going through hard times in his relationship with his girl/BM. We were hanging out with a couple other people playing ball & just having fun. After playing ball for a couple hours of course we were starving so we stopped at pizza hut, his girl began tripping so she decided to pick him up at pizza hut. Everyone thought everything was cool. Around 12am, we received a phone call he was horribly upset talking about suicide. Now a days suicide is no joke, people do it all the time sometimes without warning signs. Thankfully my friend was okay once he was picked up & just chilled with the guys for a little bit, but not everyone is lucky as lucky as us. Sometimes their friend doesn't make it home.

More than 75% of all individuals who complete suicides did things in the few weeks or months prior to their deaths to indicate to others that they were in deep despair. Anyone expressing suicidal feelings needs immediate attention.

2. Suicidal behavior is a cry for help.

The fact that a person is still alive is evidence that part of him/her wants to remain alive. Suicidal individuals are ambivalent—parts of them want to live and parts of them want to end the pain. If a suicidal person turns to you, it is likely they believe you are caring and trust you to help. No matter how negative their view on life, they are doing a positive thing by talking to you.

3. Be willing to give and get help sooner rather than later.

Evidence points to the fact that getting help as soon as possible is the best way to help your friend. Suicidal individuals are often afraid that trying to get help may make them look stupid, foolish or sinful. They often fear rejection, punishment, suspension from school, records being created about their condition or involuntary commitment. You should do everything you can to help them with their pain and get them help.

4. Ask.

Talking about suicide will not give someone the idea. Asking them about feelings of suicide can be difficult. But in fact, talking about it may help them feel less alone and more cared about—the opposite of what may have led them to the suicidal feelings in the first place.

How to ask:

• Are you thinking about dying?

• Are you thinking about hurting yourself?

• Are you thinking about suicide?

• Have you thought about how you would do it?

• Do you know when you would do it?

• Do you have the means to do it?

5. Listen.

Listen to your friend without judgment, and let them know that you are there for them and care for them. Reassure your friend that you are glad they turned to you.

6. If you think the person is in immediate danger, do not leave him alone.

If the means by which they talk about committing suicide are present, try to get rid of them. Call someone you trust, 911, or take them to an emergency room. If you are in a situation where you don’t know much about the person—

such as an online friendship—encourage them to call 911 on their own or to call a suicide hotline. If they refuse to call, try to learn whatever personal information you can about them—don’t be afraid to ask them their address, phone number and other information to help get them emergency help.

7. Urge professional help.

Encourage them with persistence to seek help for their feelings. Be patient and let them know you care. Accompany them to CAPS, or if it is after hours, call (321) 674-8111 and ask to speak with the counselor-on-call. If necessary, accompany them to an emergency room.

8. Tell.

Even if you feel like you would be betraying your friend if you tell, seek help. Do not try to do it alone. It is safest to get help for the person and for yourself. Tell someone you trust, or if necessary call 911.